two and a half

Today was the last day of my vacation job. Mixed feelings engaged as in other lasts that one faced. Joy, for i now needn't face typically ugly tourists who scream and shout in my face; for now i needn't face the nonsensical accusations throw to me by them. Dismay, for now i would have to return to my books.

Two and a half months. That was the length of time i had spent in the shop. Friends made. Views broadened.

I have always told everyone i don't have many friends. As friendly and bickerish as i try to be, i am but one engulfed in solitude. Not because i am utterly afraid of making friends. More because i find myself unworthy of anyone's friendship. Just as i wouldn't want myself to be associated with certain people. I have always proceeded with my life alone. Whilst everyone would have former classmates being in the same class as them, i was all alone in polytechnic. History repeated itself when i was in the army. Then now again that i'm in unversity. Peers went for job interviews with company. I went alone.

Most of the time, i would revise in the school library till it closes. Alone. I picked up bowling because the sport didn't require somebody else to spar with. Just you and yourself. I have to say i love shopping and walking around. But they do not make me feel better. On the contrary, you see people in groups while you are lone. Add salt to the wound, some would say.

A ripple amidst my solitude. That is my display nick in Messenger today. I seldom receive presents. But in my two and a half months' vacation job, i have received presents after presents. I needn't have to think twice about feeling happy.

I am but a simple man. Simple things do make or break my day.